Willie the Wave Loses Bid

MALIBU, CA - On Monday, Wille the Wave, long-time mascot of Pepperdine University, found out he was not picked by his top-choice sorority, Gamete Wave Omega.

"I just thought they were right for me,” Willie said in an interview with Undertow News. “I’ve been calling myself a Wave for so long, and they didn’t pick me.”

On the Gamete Wave Omega Facebook page, their description reads, “Gamete Wave Omega provides women with opportunities to be women with women around women for women by women.”

“It’s because I’m a man, isn’t it?” Willie said before storming away from the interviewer.

Gamete Wave Omega pride themselves on their stewardship. They actively participate in charity events put on by the Fountain of Youth Foundation, which raises money to provide aging women in Malibu with cosmetic surgeries.

Junior Kayla Gracyn said, “They just get so old and wrinkly. We want them all to look young again! I feel like I’m part of something bigger. For the next couple of years, I can see a hag I helped and feel better about myself knowing that I made her look better. Anything I can do to beautify Malibu!”

At press time, Willie was seen sporting a sweatshirt for his last choice, Alpha Kale Beta.